CHAPTER 16

“Just where have you been, Miss Wings?” Tess asked sternly as Monica
closed the front door behind her. Tess couldn’t help but notice the
happy glow that was radiating from her friend and she tried to hide a
smile.

Monica smiled as she walked over to where Tess stood awaiting her
answer,
“I went to complete my assignment,” She replied before hugging her
friend,
“Oh Tess, it felt so wonderful to be able to finally complete what I was
here to do and Stacey is going to be just fine!”

Tess smiled as she returned the hug,
“I’m glad to hear that, baby. I had a feeling that was where you were,
but I wasn’t sure.”

“Where’s Andrew?” Monica asked, realizing he was not nearby.

Tess sighed softly as she pointed towards the glass door, her eyes sadly
focused on her Angel Boy.

Monica walked up to the door and gazed outside, seeing Andrew standing
down by the water’s edge, his head bowed and his hands in his pockets.
She noticed how his shoulders sagged as though he were terribly upset by
something. She turned inquisitive eyes back to Tess,
“Is he alright?” Her Irish brogue was heavy with deep concern for her
beloved friend and angel as she looked back outside.

“Well, baby, not really,” Tess walked up behind Monica and laid her
hands on her charge’s shoulders,
“You went through a terrible ordeal, Monica—one that we weren’t at all
sure you would recover from. From the moment you were brought here,
Andrew was beside you almost every minute. It took an emotional toll on
him, baby and he’s also now carrying a lot of anger and hate in his
heart for Kathleen. I’ve tried to talk to him, but he won’t have any of
it. He’s hurting right now and trying to cope with having nearly lost
you, and I can’t reach him.”

Without a second thought, Monica reached for the knob and opened the
door, softly shutting it on her way out. She walked down to the water’s
edge, the ocean breeze blowing through her hair,
“Andrew?” She said softly as she approached him.

He didn’t turn to face her, as his green eyes gazed out over the ocean,
“Where’d you go?” He asked her, his voice tight.

“To see Stacey,” She replied gently, her eyes fixed on him,
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I wanted to do this alone—for some
reason, doing this alone was important to me, but I never meant to upset
you.”

Andrew sighed softly, though he still didn’t look at her,
“It shouldn’t have upset me, Monica. I guess I’m just still worrying
about you, though I guess that is no longer warranted.”

For some reason, she felt deeply wounded by his words and tone of
voice. She knew he was hurting though and she was determined to get him
to open up to her,
“I wanted to thank you, for everything you’ve done for me over the last
few weeks. I know it couldn’t have been easy for you, but I couldn’t
have gotten through it without you and I’m glad I didn’t have to.”

Andrew closed his eyes, hearing her words and remembering just how hard
the last few weeks had been. He felt tears well up in his eyes as he
remembered finding her, unconscious, soaking wet and on the brink of
death. Though he knew she was fine now, he couldn’t seem to get the
images out of his mind and heart,
“I thought we were going to lose you,” He said softly, his voice losing
its cool edge,
“And I, for one, didn’t think I’d be able deal with that.”

“I can imagine how you felt,” Monica said gently as she slipped both
her arms around one of his,
“Much like how I felt thinking you and Tess were going to leave me. The
thought of it was unbearable and I didn’t handle it very well, until you
both made me realize that I couldn’t keep the pain inside of me
forever. I was convinced that admitting how deeply afraid I was would
cause me to go to pieces, and it did, but you and Tess where there to
pick up those pieces for me. Just like I’m here for you now.”

He heard her gentle words and felt the warmth of her arms around his and
soft feeling of her head resting against his shoulder. Oh, how he loved
her! He felt tears threaten his eyes once more and he looked up at the
sky and let out a deep breath, trying to keep his emotions intact.
Without a sound and to fulfill a need within himself, Andrew pulled her
into his arms and held onto her as tightly as he dared. He felt her
arms circle around his waist and he nuzzled his face into her soft
auburn hair. They stood like that in silence for several moments,
before he pulled away and took her hand into his,
“Lets take a walk.” He uttered, his voice catching in his throat.

Monica clutched his hand tightly as they walked together down the
beach. Her heart was racing with worry and she desperately wished he
would talk to her. She was just opening her mouth to fill the air with
something besides silence, when Andrew finally spoke.

“I guess I’m still feeling a little rattled by everything that has
happened,” He began softly,
“I was afraid we were going to lose you. Not to death, but as an
angel. Sam was worried that you wouldn’t recover from what you had been
through and if that had been the case, then God would have provided for
you and I knew that. I just couldn’t imagine not working with you day
after day and I started to really realize how important you are to me
and how deeply I would miss you. It was horrible, watching you go
through this whole thing—the nightmares, the pain that was always in
your eyes, and Monica, what I wanted more than anything was to be able
to switch places with you. I would gladly have gone through what you
did, then to watch you suffer a minute longer. You didn’t deserve any
of this and the hardest thing I’d ever done was watch you go through
it.” His voice trailed off for a moment as he struggled with his
emotions momentarily,
“I know it’s wrong, but I cannot forgive, nor will I ever forget what
Kathleen did to you this time. She went too far, Monica, not that she
hasn’t before, but this time was the last straw. “

Monica stopped walking and pulled him to face her. Her cheeks were
streaked with tears and her eyes were filled with her concern and love
for him,
“Andrew, you have to let go of that anger.”

“Monica, don’t you see? I’m telling you that I can’t. I’ve tried, but
as each day went by and I saw and heard all of the things she had done
this time…..I can’t forgive her.” He looked at her, tears of sorrow in
his eyes,
“She was someone you loved once; your best friend. How could she do
what she did to you with no remorse? The fact that she was once someone
you trusted makes me even angrier with her. “

“She can do these things without remorse because she is not of God,
Andrew and you know that. Your anger is exactly what she wants! Don’t
you see that? Anger and hate drive us further away from God,” Monica’s
voice was desperate as she pleaded with him to understand,
“Don’t you see that I love you too much to let this destroy you?”

“You don’t know what it was like, Monica! Watching you suffer each day
from things she had done! Wondering if you were ever going to come back
to us! So don’t you see that I love you too much to just wait around
for her to attack you again?” He closed his eyes as she began to cry,
hating the pain he was causing her, but unable to hide his feelings any
longer.

“But I’m fine, Andrew!” She sobbed, searching for a way to convince him
that he was wrong to feel this way. She had never been more afraid for
someone in her existence as she was for Andrew right this moment,
“I’m fine!”

Shaking, his hands reached up to cup her face,
“And I’m going to make sure you stay that way.”

“No!” She screamed, backing up from him,
“Not like this! I want your love and I want your protection but not
like this! It isn’t worth throwing everything away! Andrew, this will
destroy you, if you let it! If you love me like you say you do, then
you will forget about this! You will talk to God and ask Him to help
you get rid of the hatred that is in your heart and you will forgive
Kathleen!”

Andrew looked at her sadly, hating himself for making her cry. He shook
his head sadly,
“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” He whispered, his words coming out in a sob,
“But that just isn’t in me right now.” He watched as she bowed her head
as she continued to cry. Approaching her carefully, he pulled her close
for a moment and kissed the top of her head, before releasing her and
walking away.

Monica looked up through tear-filled eyes as he walked away and then
vanished,
“Andrew!” She sobbed, before falling to her knees in the sand. She
covered her face with her hands; feeling like her heart was broken as
she prayed for the safety of her beloved Angel of Death.