CHAPTER 18

Andrew and Paul went into the room quietly, not wanting to startle the angel if she happened to be awake. She didn’t even move when Andrew sat beside her on the bed, and he had a brief moment of anxiety, wondering if he should have insisted that she stay awake.

“Monica?” he called, moving the icepack from her face and gently stroking down the side of her swollen jaw.

He breathed in deeply as her eyes flickered open. They still held traces of fear, but cleared as she saw that she was still in her bed, and the voice calling her had been Andrew’s.

“I was dreaming, I think,” she said quietly. “We were back at that little house in the woods, and Tess kept giving me coffee ice-cream.”

“Then you know it was only a dream,” Andrew chuckled, “because Tess monitors your caffeine intake like a hawk.” He was hoping for at least a small grin, but none appeared.

“Paul!” she turned her head slightly and saw him standing near the door. “You can come in,” she told him, her heart warming slightly at his sudden shyness. She raised her uninjured hand to her face. “I hope I don’t look as bad as I feel.” she was joking, but without the accompanying smile her words took on a poignant tone.

“You look just fine,” he said. “Much better than David’s going to once we have a little chat.” He meant to be supportive and reassuring, but he realized his mistake as soon as the words left his mouth.

Monica was shaking her head and looking at him with heartbreaking eyes. “Paul, you can’t. That’s not what I want.”

He knew that the smart thing would be to agree with her and apologize but his emotions had seemingly taken control of his voice. “Monica, the guy beat you up! You think I’m going to let him get away with that?”

“Yes,” she replied, staring right through his eyes and into his soul. “Promise me that you won’t seek revenge for me.”

Paul sighed as he sat down at the foot of the bed, reaching out one hand to pat her leg. “I promise,” he agreed, but inside he was thinking that it wouldn’t actually be revenge if he just happened to pick a fight with the guy.

“Thank you.” She reached out to him and he inched closer to take her hand. “I’m glad you’re here,” she said. “I know it sounds strange, but having you and Andrew both around makes me feel completely safe.”

“You seem to forget that we didn’t actually do that great a job of it last time,” Paul scoffed as one eyebrow crept up.

“Maybe, but I can’t change how I feel.”

“Well I don’t think I have to tell you that I’d do anything in my power to keep you safe.”

“I think it’s part of some contract we signed,” Andrew piped up as he stood up to give Paul more room. “Once a protector, always a protector.”

Monica finally smiled, and even let out the tiniest of laughs.

“Here, let me see that wrist,” Paul said as he took Andrew’s place at her side and, reached into his bag to take out the bandage. “I’ve had more than a few sprained wrists in my time.”

He had to clench his jaw to keep from saying all that he wanted to as he looked at the swelling and bruising. He didn’t think that the two angels would be interested in the various and inventive ways he had learned to swear during F.B.I. boot camp at Quantico. Instead he was as gentle and quick and quiet as could be as he bandaged her wrist.

“It feels better already,” Monica said, tracing a finger along the tan wrap. She hoped that she sounded as grateful as she felt despite her grief over needing such attention in the first place.

Paul looked into her eyes, but didn’t comment on what he saw there. “I’m glad,” he said instead. “I wish I could stay longer, but I have some work I need to get done,” he said after a brief pause, “but I’ll be checking in on you later and I expect to hear that you followed all of Andrew and Tess’ advice.”

“Since I don’t feel much like leaving this bed, I think that won’t be a problem,” Monica answered, a slight hint of sadness back in her voice.

“Just rest. You’ll feel better later, I can practically guarantee it.” Paul squeezed her hand for a long moment before rising and heading out the door.

“Paul?” The sound of Monica’s voice stopped him as he turned around once more, something he was trying to forget stirring in his heart at the hopeful look in her dark eyes, as he waited for her to continue.

“Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

He smiled, shaking his head slightly, “No need for you to worry about that, honey. I’m here for as long as your Boss allows me to be. I’ll check in with you later. I promise.”

She nodded her head, reassured, but being careful to not cause herself any unnecessary pain. As she watched Paul leave, Andrew resumed his seat on the bed beside of her and gently reached to stroke her temple, “How are you feeling, sweetheart?”

Monica debated how she wanted to answer that question as she tried to separate the physical from the emotional in her mind and not being at all sure of which one Andrew was referring to so she settled on the most honest answer she could find that summed up all of her feelings, “I hurt.”

“I know,” He replied just as simply, so clearly able to feel the fear and confusion in heart, “Tess is fixing you something to eat. Do you want to try to sit up?”

Nervousness appeared in the little angel’s dark eyes at the thought of Tess being here and undoubtedly knowing of her failure. Though she had known that there was no way to really keep it from her supervisor, she had hoped for more time… a lot more time.

“You have nothing to worry about,” Andrew told her gently, seeing the worry in her eyes and only wanting to erase it, “Everyone understands that you had no control over how things happened today, even Tess. Now, come on, let me help you up.”

He was as gentle and slow as he knew how to be, as he wrapped his strong arm around her and helped her to a sitting position with pillows behind her back, but even despite all his efforts, her eyes were still clouded with tears of pain as she pressed the fingers of her good hand to her forehead.

“I’m sorry, angel,” He said his voice heavy with remorse over having caused her additional pain.

“It’s not your fault,” She insisted weakly, her fingers hesitantly touching the bandage above her eye. She wanted to burst into tears at the terrifying memories the bandage evoked in her, but she refrained, not wanting to put Andrew through anymore than she had already put him through today.

Seeing her struggle, he reached up and touched her bruised and swollen cheek, watching as the gesture caused a tear to escape her eye.

“Why is this happening to me, Andrew?” Her voice was so soft and filled with such sorrow that it nearly broke his heart.

“I don’t know, Monica,” He admittedly truthfully, wishing he had a better answer for her.

“Only the Father knows that right now, baby,” Tess added as she walked into the room carrying a tray containing a sandwich and a cup of coffee for the younger angel. She watched as Monica looked at her, her expression one of remorse and guilt and Tess knew she had to find a way to alleviate those feelings.

“Tess, I’m sorry, I-,” But her supervisor was quick to cut her off as she set the tray on Monica’s lap.

“Angel Girl, an apology is not warrented nor needed for the things that have happened so far with your assignment,” Tess told her gently as she sat down on the other side of the bed, “Truth be told, I am the one who is sorry for how things happened today as I never want to see you hurt, especially not at the hands of a confused, though violent man.”

Monica lowered her eyes, feeling unable to meet her supervisor’s gaze at the moment, “I lied to him,” She stated simply, as if this justified whatever actions David had taken against her.

“You protected Kristin from him,” She contradicted, waiting until the little angel had raised her eyes once more to continue, “The Father still has a plan, baby and though He is the last one who wants to see any pain come to you, He can take even this and turn it into something good if you just give him the chance to do so.”

“But I promised David I’d stay away from he and Kristin,” She explained tearfully, “I had to promise or he…”

“Or he wouldn’t have stopped his abuse against you,” Andrew stated, a hint of anger in his voice at this information that he had just pieced together.

She started to nod her head, but stopped the motion as pain tore through her, “Maybe I shouldn’t have done that. Maybe I should have just allowed him to continue until God found a way to stop him…”

“No one deserves such acts of abuse, Monica, not even an angel,” Tess replied adamently, knowing that was true, “And God can help you turn this around.”

Monica fell silent for a moment, her eyes on the sandwich on her plate, the very thought of eating causing her to feel sick on her stomach as her body ached so badly, “What if I don’t want to turn it around, Tess?” She whispered, “I’m so tired of people trying to hurt me and tired of making mistakes that make them feel like they need to do that in the first place.”

There it was. The guilt that Tess and Andrew had started to expect was beginning to leave the oldest angel more than slightly unsettled, “Listen to me, Monica,” She began, reaching to take the little angel’s hand in her own, “These mistakes that you speak so freely of are simply the Father’s plan unfolding around you. Joshua would have died that night, with or without you. Did it ever occur to you that you were right where God needed you to be in order to be able to identify the man who had done that? You may think that you lingered in a place when you should have been moving on, but God has a plan, baby. He always does. We may not be able to always understand it and we may not be able to always see His hand, but in our hearts we know that He is always in control of every situation. He brought Andrew to you, and He gave you Paul, who has become a loyal friend and the Father did these things because He loves you. But in return, you need to trust Him, Angel Girl and just like you have told many an assignment, He is always with you and He catches every tear you shed.”

The tears that Tess spoke of trailed down her pale face as she felt Andrew move closer to her, as if trying to shield her from her own pain, “I don’t want to let Him down…”

“You could never do that, angel,” He offered her, trying to take strength from Tess’ words of wisdom, “He knows your heart, just as He knows David’s heart and for some reason, only known to the One who knows all truth, He placed the two of you together though that reason will only become known to you both in His time.”

“I don’t see how I can help him now,” She pleaded, a part of her wishing that she could find a way and another part of her not caring enough to try, “He’d rather raise his hand to me than to listen to anything I have to say.”

“His heart isn’t ready to hear the truth yet, baby. Sometimes a man has to hit rock bottom to be ready to embrace what God sends us here to tell. The good news is that even at the bottom, He is there as through you, God will meet David in the place where the truth can be heard.”

Slowly, Monica leaned her pounding head back against her pillows as she closed her eyes, “God wants me to go back to work at the bar…”

“Not tonight, baby,” Tess admonished softly with a shake of her head,” Paul was going to stop at O’Reilly’s on his way back to his hotel to let them know you wouldn’t be in tonight,” She explained, saying a silent prayer that the agent was not going to wait at the bar for David to show up in order to even the score on Monica’s behalf, “But when you do return, the Father wants you to proceed gently and carefully, until David is in that place where he can hear what you have to say.”

Eyes still closed, the little angel let out a trembling breath, “I’ll try, Tess. I’ll try.”

“That’s all He is asking you to do, baby,” Her supervisor replied, as she reached over and laid a hand on her swollen face, just as Andrew had done moments before, “I know this has been hard, Angel Girl, and you have felt unprepared, but you are doing just fine. The Father says so, and so do I.”

Paul ran his fingers through his hair and then swept the back of his wrist over forehead, brushing away the light sheen of perspiration that had gathered there. Then it was back to typing as he peered into the small late-model monitor and ran searches and crosschecks and verifications against his three most likely suspects. He paused once more to redirect the small fan that was clamped to his desk. His temporary office at the main agency headquarters was more like a storage closet with a desk, and it was hot, stuffy and uncomfortable. He longed for his own office, at the satellite branch near his farm, with its sleek black seventeen inch monitor and adjustable air-conditioning.

His notebook, with the dates and transaction amounts from Mike’s bank account lay open on the desk. He still hadn’t run the checks against them. He told himself that he had other leads from other suspects that were more incriminating, but the truth was that he didn’t want to discover the truth if it meant that the man he had trusted for so many years was also the man who had led to the death of at least a dozen innocent people, including the woman he had planned to spend the rest of his life growing old with.

Paul was the type of man who kept to himself much of the time. He didn’t have a lot of close friends, preferring to be more selective. He had always thought himself to be a very good judge of character, something that came in very useful in his line of work. The idea that he could have been so wrong about someone close to him set his stomach churning. No. There were other men who could be responsible.

“Hey, Paul, how’s it going here in the sauna?” Mike didn’t bother knocking before stepping through the open door, and Paul nonchalantly stacked a pile of folders on top of his notebook.

“Not bad,” he replied. “Going slower than I hoped, but I’ll get him.”

“I’m sure you will… eventually,” Mike leaned against the doorframe and folded his arms across his chest. This was his last chance. If he couldn’t distract the younger agent then he was going to have to put into motion the plan he had already thought out in his head.

“You look like you have something on your mind.”

“Yeah, actually I do,” Mike said. “I know how much this mission means to you, but I might have to ask you to hand it off to someone else.”

“What? Why?”

“There’s another witness due to need protection within the week.”

“Mike, you have other agents.”

“I know that, but you’re the best, and don’t pretend you don’t know it. It’s a high profile case. I can’t just leave it to anyone.”

Paul balked. There was no way he was giving up without a fight. “Fine. You can put me on it, but I’m not handing this off to anyone. You say I’ve got a week? I’ll just have to work a little faster, and if I don’t have it nailed down then I’ll work on it in the field.” His dark eyes met Mike’s. “This is Lauren’s case. I’m not just giving it away.”

Mike nodded, mouth stretched into a grim line. He had been expecting that. He hadn’t been lying when he’d said Paul was the best, and he already knew that he was on the short-list of suspects. Paul was already so close he doubted that it would take a week to piece together enough to have a prosecutable case.

“Alright, Paul. You know I’m not gonna yank it out from under you.” He was going to play this out as long as he possibly could. He stepped forward and stretched out one hand to point the fan at his face. “You really need to get a few more of these,” he joked.

Paul smiled, but then his eye caught on something. Mike’s watch. It was a gold Rolex and worth probably more than he made in a month. “Nice watch,” he commented, as much to see the reaction as anything else.

The other agent withdrew his hand and then looked down at the slim, distinctive watch. “Yeah, and it cost a bundle too,” he said, his words carefully measured. “Rich old aunt died and left me with some kind of trust fund. I don’t keep track of it much, just smile every time I see a deposit from it.” His head was still tilted downwards, but he kept glancing at Paul out of the corner of his eye. The other agent looked relaxed, almost relieved, and he took a breath and looked up again. “Anyway, I’d better not hold you up anymore. Remember, just say the word if you need any help.”

“Will do.”

He watched as Mike left the office and headed down the hallway towards the elevators, probably on his way to his own office. He carefully moved the files off of his notebook and looked down at the scribbled dates and amounts. Everything in his heart wanted to believe that the money was the gift of an extremely generous and wealthy relative. His eyes flicked up to his monitor, and to the tiny clock in the corner. Nearly four o’clock. He closed the notebook and tucked it under his arm as he stood. He needed to get to O’Reilly’s. Maybe he’d get a chance to compare his notes to the newly copied files after he got back to the hotel. Or maybe it could wait until morning.

The day had started out hot and it had only gotten hotter as the minutes and hours passed. Even the shady spot David had found in the park wasn’t much cooler than the rest of the city. He sat on an old stone bench, head cradled in his hands as he leaned forward with his elbows on his knees. His head wouldn’t stop pounding and he squeezed it tightly as if he could press the pain out. He needed a stiff drink.

He lifted his head and looked down at his hands, slowly making each one into a fist and then uncurling it to lie harmlessly in his lap. He still couldn’t believe he had actually hit her. Like an old nickel movie it played over in his brain, scratchy in places, with a soundtrack that skipped and repeated. He hadn’t planned it. It had just happened. He clenched his fists again. She had deserved it. He never would have done it if she hadn’t deserved it.

A light breeze carried the scent of roses, Kristin’s favorite flower, and he dropped his head to his hands once more. He remembered when he had brought her flowers at least once a week. That seemed like a lifetime ago. Now, with the menial jobs he picked up at the dock and a few warehouses every once in a while, he was lucky to keep them in food. Unemployment was going to run out soon, and then the baby would arrive and he wouldn’t even have the money to pay hospital bills. This was not the way his life was supposed to go. He had done everything right. Finished school, gone to college, gotten a good job and married the love of his life. He was supposed to be enjoying life. All he wanted to do was forget it in the bottom of a bottle. He needed a stiff drink. It was four o’clock, and O’Reilly’s was only a block away.