CHAPTER 15

Andrew opened his eyes slowly and peered at the clock on his nightstand. The restlessness he was feeling in his heart coming from his dearest friend contradicted the fact that it was just nearing five o’clock in the morning. He was already pulling on a shirt when he heard her bare feet hit the stairs.

They had talked late into the night and Monica had filled him in on the things Faith had told her about God, and her parents and he felt another trickle of rage at anyone instilling that kind of fear in a child. Monica had been deeply troubled by all that had been said as well as the almost certain knowledge that Gregory Tate had indeed killed his wife, so Andrew wasn’t all that surprised to find her awake and staring out the window when he descended the steps.

Hues of deep lavender were just beginning to shoot across the darkened sky as he approached her and took her hand, "Come on," He said softly as he led her to the door.

She nearly hesitated. Other than her ride into town with Jake the previous day, she had not dared to venture outside, but now she relented. The feeling of Andrew’s hand in her own allowed for feelings of security to rise to the very tip of her soul and she gave a little squeeze as he led her outside and down onto the dock.

She shivered slightly as the early morning air was quite chilly and her nightgown provided little protection, but a second later, Andrew had wrapped an afghan around her shoulders that she hadn’t even realized he had grabbed and she smiled thankfully at him. A moment later and they were both sitting in the oversized wooden chair that Tess normally occupied.

"Warm enough?" He asked her lightly as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

She nodded her head as she breathed in deeply, even as her eyes took in the lake, which she was just able to see through the darkness. The mist was rising on the water as the crickets played their final serenade of the evening and the entire scene filled all her senses and soothed her restless spirit.

After a moment of amiable silence, she finally spoke, "Thank you." There had been an apology on the tip of her tongue for waking him, but she knew he neither required nor needed one and he would probably only scold for her offering it to begin with. He gave her a gentle squeeze in response and she smiled, knowing what he was doing. He was giving her time alone with her thoughts, outside where she had longed to be, while taking away the element of fear with his presence.

The minutes ticked by before she finally spoke again, "Everything feels nearly perfect, doesn’t it?"

He started to raise his eyebrows in surprise before he realized that her comment really didn’t surprise him at all, but he could still hope that he was wrong, "How so, angel?"

"With Faith being allowed to stay with us like this. I mean, if the Father had wanted her found, then the Sheriff would have found her today, but he didn’t which means she can stay with us longer." She leaned her head against his shoulder in contentment, "It just feels like it’s the way it is supposed to be and none of us are in a hurry for her to leave anyway."

His eyes widened at her words, spoken so nonchalantly. Though he knew Monica had a tendency to collect things; seashells, kittens, agents, he really didn’t think that three angels adopting one human child was part of the plan. "Angel Girl, this assignment isn’t over yet and there is still work to be done in order to find out what God’s plan is for Faith. Actually, we should probably head into town later to see if anyone else knows anything about her,"

But she was already shaking her head at the suggestion.

"We have plenty of time, Andrew and I promised Faith we would paint today."

He had to wonder at times how her heart ever kept up with her quickly changing emotions, even as he heard warning bells going off in his own head. He also wondered if maybe she had read one too many fairytales to the little girl, "Monica, painting isn’t going to find Faith a family."

"As far as she is concerned, Andrew, she already has one," The little angel argued softly.

"Perhaps, but you and I know the truth," His voice was gentle, but even so, he felt her sadness wrap itself around his heart.

"Just let me pretend a little bit longer," Monica whispered after a moment.

"Pretending is only going to serve in hurting you more when it’s time to face the truth, angel," He advised, but he could already tell that she had withdrawn slightly and he emitted a little sigh.

"She told me I sang like an angel," She said quietly, her voice laced with sadness, "No one has ever told me that before. I know that isn’t the truth, but with the innocence of a child she doesn’t realize what the truth is. I miss feeling that way."

His heart ached at her admission, now understanding that she had found something in Faith that she longed to recapture within herself. She had come so far since her two extremely difficult assignments, but not so far that she couldn’t recognize the things that had not been "fixed".

"I know," Andrew replied after a moment, pulling her closer to him, "But don’t give up hope that you will get those things back. God is working in your heart all the time and you know He makes all things possible."

Before she could think of how to reply to his words, a voice that sent shivers up her spine disrupted the quiet.

"You’d better watch yourself, angel! Jake may not be able t’ see through you, but I can! I know what you’re up to and this is the last warning I’m givin’ ya!"

Andrew’s eyes darted around as he felt Monica press into him fearfully. He couldn’t see Greg Tate anywhere, but obviously the man could see them and he felt his anger begin to resurface. The trembling he could feel coming from his best friend only intensified it and he rose to his feet, all his senses on high alert, "And I’m warning you, Greg, that you’d better not come within a mile of her and that is the only warning I’m giving you."

He heard the footsteps and Monica’s startled cry before he could turn around, but as he did he saw that Greg had hold of her arm as he had walked up behind them.

"You were sayin’?" His voice was ominous as held on fast to the little angel’s arm, even as she struggled to get away.

It took Andrew two strides to come face to face with the man, his angry hands grabbing Greg by the shirt collar, startling him enough to release his hold on Monica.

"I was saying that you’d better not come within a mile of her!" Andrew shouted as his hands tightened around the rough fabric of the denim shirt.

His voice was shaking with the rage that coursed through his body. Too many people had tried to hurt his best friend and he had been unable to do anything about it. This time was different. This time the person was right in front of him and for the first time he didn’t feel anything holding him back from acting on the intense feelings of anger and frustration that he had been holding onto. For over a year he had harbored them in a dark place deep in his heart, waiting for them to disappear, but now it was obvious that they hadn’t.

Taking a step forward he forced Greg to stumble backwards and then he pushed him into the tree at the end of the dock. He let go of him just long enough to get a bigger grip before shaking him and pushing him against the tree trunk again.

"You like to threaten innocents? Is that what makes you feel like a real man? You bully and abuse everyone around you and when they’re gone you start in on someone you don’t even know?"

Andrew’s face was only an inch from Greg’s as he continued to shout. He didn’t even feel his own arm pulling back. It was as if he was watching someone else’s hand swing forward and strike the red-faced man in the jaw, sending his head snapping back against the hard wood.

"Andrew! Andrew please! Please stop!" Monica was nearly in tears as she moved up behind him, her trembling hand reaching out to grab him but not daring to touch him.

She had seen him angry, but never anything like this. In the past he had always had an inner restraint, but now that restraint was gone and she didn’t know what to do. A sob caught in the back of her throat and her fingertips barely brushing his shoulder.

"Please… please stop!" she whispered brokenly.

Her words managed to penetrate through the cloud of madness that had wrapped itself around the blond angel. He released his hold on Greg and stepped back as if he had just been burned. Meanwhile Greg just stared at him, contempt in his eyes and a satisfied smirk on his lips. He raised his hand to rub at the side of his face.

"You don’t know what you’re talking about, but you just bought yourself a bunch of trouble, boy," he said.

Andrew took a breath and another step back. "Maybe I have, but not from you." He looked over his shoulder at Monica and felt his heart sink, then turned back to Greg. "You’re on private property. Now get out of here."

"Yeah, I’ll leave, but you people don’t own the whole mountain. You got the first punch this time," he sneered at Andrew. "It won’t happen again."

He turned and there was silence save for the clomping sound of his heavy boots across the dock. Andrew watched him until he vanished into the thick underbrush and then he turned around, dreading what he would find. His stomach twisted even more when he glanced around Monica and saw Faith in the cottage, standing by the window, just one eye peering out, wide and frightened. When he looked at her he saw her turn and run away. His jaw clenched and he shut his eyes. He didn’t know how he was going to explain himself to Monica, never mind a traumatized eight-year-old.

When he opened his eyes a moment later, Monica was staring at him as if she had never seen him before, and he couldn’t blame her for her shock. In all the times she had claimed failure on her assignments, in all the times she had doubted her abilities… she had never once done something to hurt a human being. On the contrary: she was far more likely to sacrifice herself. Knowing that, he couldn’t understand how she could even stand to look at him.

"Monica… I… I…" he didn’t even know where to begin but suddenly he didn’t have to because she was rushing forward and throwing her arms around him. He had to mentally shake himself to even believe what was happening.

"Please… I don’t want to talk about it right now," she whispered, and he didn’t think he would ever be able to hear her say the word ‘please’ without wincing.

"But, Monica…"

"Just for a few minutes, Andrew. For a few minutes I just want to forget."

Her words cut deeply. It wasn’t just the last ten minutes she wanted to forget. She wanted to forget everything. Somehow she already knew what had driven him to strike out and she wanted pretend none of it had ever happened. How he wished that pretending could make that true for her. Instead he just held onto her tightly, waiting for her heartbeat to slow down and for her to relax against him.

"I’m so sorry, Angel," he said at last, his voice thick with emotion. "I never meant for that to happen."

He felt her take in a shuddering breath before speaking. "Of course you didn’t."

"I wasn’t even thinking… I just felt this anger welling up inside me and suddenly I couldn’t hold onto it anymore."

Monica eased herself out of his embrace and looked up at him sadly. "You’ve carried it with you for a long time," she said quietly. "You’ve done so much to help me and I never even asked about you. I guess I wanted to believe that you were fine."

He took her face in his hands and stared into her eyes. "Not your fault, Monica. That’s what I wanted to believe too."

She gave a sad little laugh. "I guess this pretending stuff really doesn’t work out in the end, does it?"

"No… I’m afraid it doesn’t."

Suddenly a horrible thought occurred to the Irish angel and the color drained from her face. "What is the Father going to do about this?" her voice was very small.

Andrew’s expression was one of grief and resignation. "I’m not sure. I guess we’ll find out."

She started shaking her head and her chin quivered. "I don’t know how I could bear it if He sent you away from here."

He rested his hands lightly on her shoulders. "Monica, you’re stronger than you think, and we both know that whatever He decides, is no more than what I deserve."

The screen door suddenly opened and then slammed shut and they looked up at the cottage and saw Tess striding towards them. "Well you’ve got that right, baby," Tess said, her voice tinged with annoyance. "But apparently He has decided that you’re better off dealing with your feelings here, where it’s harder to control them, then out in God’s Country where it’s easy to remember all the reasons why angels were created… But just let me give you a hint… beating up the human population was not one of them."

Andrew lowered his head. "I already knew that, Tess."

"Good. Then maybe you also need to remember that when your feelings become too much for you, you’re supposed to turn them over to God, not let them fester inside!" He had no reply and she walked forward and squeezed his shoulder. "I think you have some talking to do… to everyone," she said. "The good news is that I think I finally know what my real assignment is. It’s the two of you." Monica and Andrew both stared at her, realizing that she couldn’t be more right. "However, at the moment I think you all need some alone time, and I need to go into town and try to discover where exactly this little girl we have acquired is supposed to end up."

With that said, she didn’t wait for a reply but turned around and headed for her car. A minute later and she was rumbling down the dirt driveway, leaving Monica and Andrew still staring after her.

"I think I need to talk to Him," Andrew said slowly. "What I just felt… what I just did… I don’t ever want to repeat either of them."

Monica nodded, unable to speak. She knew that he would only tell her how wrong she was, but she couldn’t stop the sickening feeling of responsibility from clutching her heart. She remembered the first time Andrew had shown signs of anger, and she remembered all the times after that when she had seen hints of it reemerge. They had all had something to do with the messes she had managed to get herself into. He would shrug it off and say that it was a small thing compared to what she had gone through, and maybe he was right, but that didn’t make her feel any better about it.

She swallowed hard and reached out to hold tight to his hand for a moment as she moved to go inside. "I don’t want you to have to feel that way again either," she murmured. "I’m going to find Faith and I’ll keep her busy while you have your talk."

"Thank you, Monica," he replied, blinking a little bit at her slightly awkward behavior. He knew he was going to have to talk to her again, and he needed to talk to Faith as well, but right now he had another appointment to keep.