CHAPTER 7

The difference that twenty-four hours could make was nearly astounding. Last night, she had been so sure of God's plan in this entire nightmare, but now that all felt different and Monica felt angry with herself because of that fact. She felt as if she doubted, but it wasn't God's plan she was unsure of. No, she did doubt herself and her ability to follow through on this assignment that seemed to get more difficult with each passing moment.

She had managed to get through dinner without another run in with Sheila, but the mean spirited inmate had glared at her all through the meal. Abby on the other hand, had completely kept her distance and avoided Monica completely, so the little angel had simply kept to herself until they had all been escorted back to their cells for the night.

Now, she lay on her small cot, curled up tightly beneath the thin blanket and blinked back the tears that wanted to persist. People had lied to get her into this place; God hadn't placed her here, free will had. Between that knowledge and the deliberate cruelty of Sheila, Monica felt absolutely hopeless, no matter how much she didn't want to feel that way.

Blinking back the tears once again, her dark eyes gazed into the darkness, "Father, what am I supposed to do? Why did you place me here? I'm not helping anyone. What is it you want from me? What am I supposed to do, Father? What am I supposed to do?"

The tears she had been holding at bay now fell freely and she buried her face in her pillow to muffle the sobs. She felt as if she was coming apart at the seams and nothing she tried to tell herself seemed to matter. She just couldn't seem to find anything to be thankful for at the moment and that made her feel even more wretched.

Until the one individual that she would always be thankful for surrounded her with a soft glow and his tender hands pulled her into his arms and cradled her up against his chest. She may not have any answers at the moment, but the evidence of God's amazing love for her was holding her in his arms.

"I'm here, sweet angel," Andrew murmured against her hair and then he was simply content to let her cry out her grief. He knew that his news today had been a terrible blow to her, but Andrew also had the sinking suspicion that his news had not been the only thing to go wrong today.

He rocked her tenderly as if she was a small child and whispered words of his love and devotion to her until her tears began to subside. Even then, he simply held her and waited until she was ready to talk. He knew her well enough to know it would not take long.

"I'm sorry," Monica murmured tearfully, as she shook her head in obvious disgust at her own weakness, "I didn't mean to do that. I just-."

"Angel," He whispered, cupping her chin in his hand, "Don't ever apologize for showing me what you're feeling. I always want to know, baby"

Diving into the dark green of his gentle eyes, Monica found herself surrounded by peace, reassurance and much love; the unconditional and pure love that would always soothe her spirit through the most difficult times. Deeply moved, and still feeling slightly guilty for not opening her heart to him earlier that day, the little angel raised her hand and touched his face. It was a feather light touch, as if she was both treasuring and thanking his loving presence there, as that cell had recently become the loneliest place on Earth. Only the angel of death had the power to turn it into something different.

"I'm so afraid and so confused, Andrew... I know I've felt like this before but now it is different..."

Andrew took her hand and kissed her palm. Then, he moved to lean against the wall and brought her to him, still cradling her protectively in his arms.

"Tell me what happened, baby. What caused you to lose the confidence that I saw in those pretty eyes of yours only a night ago?" he asked, so softly, so gently that the Irish angel knew once again that she could open her soul to him and trust that he would take care of it.

Sighing deeply, she lowered her head. "I... I met an inmate... I believe she's been here for a while. We spoke briefly and somehow it became so easy for me to see the pain she's feeling inside..."

"Why do you say so, angel? What did she tell you?"

"Not much, but looking in her eyes I can sense much suffering, Andrew. Something tells me she needs help desperately, more than any other person in here."

Andrew was holding her hand and gave it a gentle squeeze; he already knew at least part of what was worrying her. "But she's not willing to make a friend, is she?"

"I'm afraid not..." she finally admitted, but the blond angel was determined to lift her spirits.

"She is not the first assignment who's acted like this with you, baby. You've had so many difficult ones in the past."

"You're right... Except that in the past I wasn't being accused of taking a human being's life away..."

"Accused of a crime you did not commit, Monica! God knows your kind and generous heart. He made you this perfect loving creature, and all the ones who love you know that you wouldn't be capable of hurting any living creature..."

A tiny smile appeared on the corner of her lips and she gently placed his hand against her heart. "I felt so ashamed, you know... Ashamed for you..."

"Ashamed? Why, angel?" he wanted to know, a bit surprised.

"I didn't want you to see me wearing... prison clothes and a pair of handcuffs... But now... Now, when you appear to me in the middle of the night, it doesn't matter so much..."

Andrew pulled her even closer, tightening the hold around her, and kissed the top of her head. "It really shouldn't. And soon these clothes, handcuffs and this cell will disappear, and we'll be both sitting together in a beautiful place, filled with sun and surrounded by God's wonderful creations. Everything that I know you enjoy so much."

He was rewarded with a broader smile and she was visibly enjoying that thought. But it faded soon, and was replaced by a worried, rather fearful expression.

"Another inmate doesn't seem pleased with my presence here..." she finally spoke, after a brief minute of silence.

"Another inmate?"

"She... she's already threatened me and told me to stay away from her..."

Now Andrew sat up straight, alarmed by that sudden piece of news. He cupped her chin and searched for her eyes, his usual protective instincts already on high alert. Monica tilted her head with disappointment, not missing the tension she could see in his eyes. "You're already too worried, and I knew this would happen once I told you about this person..."

"Who is she, Monica? What did she tell you? Has she done anything to you?" came the avalanche of questions.

Sighing deeply, Monica told him about the latest events involving Sheila and herself, and once she was finished the expression on his face was ten times more worried - there was no way he could hide it from her.

"Monica... angel, you have to let someone know about it, she cannot be threatening you like that!"

"If I wasn't an angel I'd tell you now that no one hears me in a place like this..." she looked at their conjoined hands, "... but I know this is not true and that God and two of His angels are always by my side, listening to me, reassuring me at this difficult moment... But apart from you and Tess, there's no one else... no one else, Andrew..."

Monica's words held so much sadness that it affected him terribly. And the fear that had settled inside the blond angel's heart was such that for a moment he didn't know what to say. All he could do was hold her tightly and kiss the top of her head repeatedly. Now he could understand those sad feelings coming from her soul, as he felt them too.

They talked for a while, and then Andrew made her lie next to him, resting her head underneath his chin. He covered her with the only blanket available there and started a monotonous movement with his fingers entangled through her hair. The blond angel was determined to make her put aside her worries at least for a while, and kept whispering loving words in her ear, even though deep down, he was the one terribly worried about what the future held for his precious angel.

"You are a wonderful angel, Monica, and I have so much faith in you... Please, don't give up... Trust that the Father, Tess and I will always be there for you, no matter what..."

"I always feel your presence even though you're miles away..." she replied, eyes closed and praying for those caresses to last.

"All those 'miles away' won't exist any longer when we get married!" he was trying to make her focus her mind on something else - Andrew knew that all that tension would end up causing her nightmares, besides reinforcing the permanent anguish that was already in her heart.

And he was rewarded with a sleepy smile. "Only you can bring me back some of my joy..."

"Don't tell me that you forgot about our marriage..." he was serious but there was an evident joking tone in his voice.

Her smile grew broader as she knew he was teasing her. Monica searched for his hand and moved her head up to look at him. Her dark eyes were sparkling and despite the sadness in them there was also a multitude of loving feelings. "How could I forget it if the promise of having your love for the rest of my existence is what keeps me standing now?"

"I love you..." after his whispered words were spoken, Andrew crossed the small distance between them and pressed his lips onto hers, so lightly, so gently that Monica felt as if she was transported to another place and time, a lot different from that one; somewhere that only belonged to them - a place where their souls connected and formed a perfect unit. He dared to deepen their loving kiss a bit more and she welcomed his tender touch, that sweet caress that was a permanent reminder of their infinite love.

It took a while before the angel in human form fell asleep but soothed by Andrew's love, Monica finally drifted off to a light sleep, lulled by the gentle movement of his fingers through her hair. In his angelic form, the angel of death spent the long hours imagining a way to take her out of that place before the worst happened. Monica, his precious Monica, had been threatened by an inmate and only God knew what that person had done to be in there. He was anguished, and that night he offered a special prayer for the Irish angel's safety, as she had already been through too much.