Netherlands - by Gaby

After Mike had helped Monica to find a more appropriate outfit for the new angel, the Irish one thanked the salesman. “Well, Mike, thank you. You’ve been very kind.”

“Nah... It’s been my pleasure...” he replied and somehow hesitantly, he asked. “Listen, Monica, if you ever feel like having dinner or lunch or something...”

“Thank you, but I can’t...” Monica replied kindly.

“Yeah, yeah... I figured... You... are already attached to someone else,” Mike said blushing lightly.

“Yes,” Monica said, her brown eyes sparkling immediately and unconsciously as they had been doing lately when she either talked of thought about a certain angel.

“Hey, baby!” Andrew appeared by her side at that moment. “What are you doing here?”

“Hullo, Andrew!” she greeted him. “Mike, here, was helping me to get some clothes for her,” she explained introducing him to the man in the store, not noticing the way he was looking at the two angels.

“I see... well, if you’re ready why don’t we go take a coffee? I’m buying,” the blond angel said.

“Ohhh, now you’re talking, Andrew!” the Irish angel exclaimed excitedly at hearing the proposition and taking his arm. “It was a big pleasure, Mike!” she said reaching a hand to shake the man’s. “Thanks for your help.”

“Any time,” he said somewhat sadly.

xx

A little while later, Monica and Andrew were sitting at a table in a café looking at the unnamed angel fixing Madeleine’s little dog. “I wonder what’s her name...” Andrew said taking a sip from his cup.

“Yes. I wish Tess was here...” the little angel told him.

“Well, here I am, Miss Wings, wondering why Mr. Halo had the brilliant idea to take you two here when he knows we have to keep your caffeine level in check!” the supervisor said appearing by their side.

“Do you know what happened?” Monica asked her supervisor. “This is all been quite a surprise, you know?”

“You are surprised, huh?” the older angel said. “So, how do you think she feels? One moment you are not, the next moment you are and then a couple of crazy angels are making you drink a gallon of fancy coffee! But the Father had a purpose for her... and for you.”

Andrew looked at Monica and then at Tess with a clueless expression. “Her brain works as a computer and learns all she reads,” Tess continued to explain. “But she has no history, no experience of past things, she has no sense of human condition. That’s why she needs help from an angel with a few thousand years under her belt,” the supervisor said looking at her charge.

“Oh, no, Tess, not me!” Monica exclaimed.

“Of course you, baby! What do you think I’m telling you all this? Who else could be? It’s a perfect match! None has a heart like you, angel girl!” Tess argued.

“That’s true, sweetie!” Andrew joined Tess, reaching to take Monica’s hand. “I’ve never met another angel with such a caring, loving heart...” he murmured bringing her hand to his mouth to kiss it under the little angel’s moved eyes.

Unnoticed by the two younger angels, Tess nodded to herself when she realized what was happening between them. “Hello, Adam!” the supervisor said when she saw the other angel of death coming closer, and just then Andrew and Monica stop looking at each other.

“Hey, guys,” Adam greeted though his voice lacked joy. “I’m sorry but I came here for Andrew, I need him now.” Looking at the puzzled faces of Andrew and Monica, he added. “It’s an emergency. Right there,” he pointed at the mall across the street.

Obediently, Andrew followed his co-worker, just when the new angel, that now knew her name, was coming back to the table. “Tess, do you know what emergency is it?” Monica asked.

“No, baby, but...” the older angel stopped mid-sentence when she saw a multitude of angels of death joining Adam and Andrew at the entrance of the mall.

For a moment, Andrew met Monica’s eyes and then lowered his head as if ashamed of what he had to do, knowing it would cause a terrible pain to the angel he loved so much. “Oh, no, Tess, not this!!” the Irish angel could barely exclaimed before a big explosion destroyed the mall.

xxx

It wasn’t until late that night when Andrew and Adam could take a little break. They had gone Heaven once and again, always taking a new soul Home, and the paramedics and the emergency services kept on rescuing more and more people out of the ruins of the mall.

“What a night!” the blond angel of death exclaimed when he met Tess in the middle of the night.

“And you say that, baby...” she replied. “They hadn’t found Madeleine and I’m getting really worried...”

“Her mother is dead, Tess,” Adam informed them. “I took her home a little ago...”

“Father, please... what else?” the older angel murmured in a very low voice but the two angels of death could hear her.

“Tess... where is Monica?” Andrew asked feeling a deep fear growing in his heart.

The dark skinned angel met his gaze and his sparkling green eyes made her heart clench. How could she tell him that the little angel had turned her back on God when she could see the unending love he felt for Monica? “Baby...”

“Tess, please!” Andrew surprised her by grabbing her arms tightly. “Where is she?!”

Tess turned to see Adam and sighed deeply before meeting Andrew’s eyes. “She’s gone, baby... She didn’t know what she was supposed to do.”

“What do you mean by she’s gone?! Where?!” the blond angel was more and more worried now.

“She didn’t know how the Father wanted her to teach Gloria to use her heart if hers was broken by all this...” Big tears were now crossing her cheeks and her voice was trembling. “She walked out, Andrew! She walked out and I don’t know where is my angel girl!”

Andrew hugged the older angel feeling how deep she was hurting... even when he felt he was hurting a thousand times more. “I’ll go find her,” he stated firmly. Both Tess and Adam turned to see him and his face was the pure picture of determination... and of something more. “I’ll go... no matter where she is, I’ll find her.”

Adam nodded. “Good luck, pal,” he said placing a hand on his shoulder.

xxx

Andrew walked hours and hours asking for guidance to find his dearest friend. He knew she was suffering too much but he couldn’t let her alone. He was hurting to know she was hurting too, but he cared too much to leave her alone... More than care, he loved her. He knew he loved her and the slim possibility to lose her was something he couldn’t bare. Night became morning when he reached the desert where Monica had been hours before, and then he knew he was in the right way. He felt the Father’s words urging him to go on, to find the little angel and never let her go again...

“Do you think you’d be a better human, Monica?” the devil was telling the little angel when Andrew finally spotted them. The blond angel was about to shout to order him to leave her alone, but Monica’s trembling voice stopped him.

“No... yes... I don’t know! Maybe!” she was crying helplessly and Andrew longed to hold her close, to swipe her tears and help her mend her broken heart.

“Would you like to see?” the devil asked the Irish angel taking advantage of the very week state she was in.

Andrew wanted to run to her knowing she was growing weaker every second, and he would have done it hadn’t he been stopped by the vision in front of them. All of a sudden, Monica (and he behind her, unnoticed) saw a house and a pretty garden in front of her. A couple of children were playing happily and at the end there was a man and a pregnant woman standing at the porch.

Monica knew well enough family human life, so Andrew knew that witnessing it was not what the little angel could want the most... He kept on watching carefully feeling how all his body trembled with expectation. Soon he recognized the woman... Monica... a straw hat covering her reddish hair, a loosen blue blouse covering her prominent belly. A mix of emotions grew on the angel’s of death heart. So this was what his friend wanted? A family? Experience pregnancy? He felt sad for her... his heart broke when he saw the big tear that fell from her eye when she saw herself and when she brought her hands to her flat belly rubbing it as if something was missing. But he was feeling sad for him too... He longed to give her anything she could ask for... but he was unable here... he had no way to do it. Tears threatened his eyes at the horrible feeling of defeat, defeat for not being able to fulfill her dream, defeat for he would lose her if she in fact got it come true.

He was barely recovering from the first shock when he paid attention to the man that was walking towards the pregnant Monica in the vision... How he wanted to drag her out of that nightmare! He saw how the man wrapped his arms around her... but when he turned to face the children in the garden, Andrew felt the world resting on his shoulders. The man hugging Monica, stroking her belly and kissing her was... he himself! Not Andrew, the angel of death, but Andrew a human being, a father of two kids and of one more coming... an in love husband able to touch and hold and kiss Monica in a way he could only dream about!! He never felt the tear crossing his cheek when he alternatively watched at the vision and at Monica, his heart was beating so wildly he was sure it would discover him. When he heard the pregnant Monica calling for Tess, as it was the little girl’s name, he knew what her friend was feeling... and he saw her then with different eyes.

Feeling completely defeated, the blond angel turned back on his steps and walked away.

x

Andrew stopped on a high spot in the same desert where Monica was going through her personal temptations. His mind was a whirlwind not knowing what he wanted anymore. So far he had always thought that being an angel was the most perfect happiness. That he couldn’t ask for more. That he couldn’t need anything more as long as he could take Monica’s hand, hug her and kiss her forehead.

But he had been tempted the same way she had been, and temptations only worked if it was in fact a wish deeply buried in the heart. All of a sudden he was wondering how it would feel to hold Monica tighter than just like a friend, how it would feel to stroke her skin that always seemed so soft as the skin of a little baby, and over all how would it feel to kiss her lips. He was remembering her lips with particular attention, the way they twirled when she smirked, the way he had always found them delicate and perfect.

So she wanted him... she wanted more than the friendship they had shared so far... but him? Did he want the same? His heart told him the answer without a single doubt. “Father... help me... help us,” he whispered lifting his head to look at the sky. “If there’s a way...”

xxx

Monica watched how the white dove flew away from her, its cooing whispering to her heart how much God loved her. She lifted her face to the sky and felt the warm rays of sun over her, cheering her heart with the promise of long years ahead all full with His love. “Thank you, Father,” she murmured again but a dim memory somehow saddened her heart again. She couldn’t take away of her mind what she had seen in the hallucination she had gone through, the feelings that had been evoked in her, the longing of actually experience some of those things...

She looked around and even the beautiful landscape couldn’t really take the whole sadness away. “I know I should not ask for anything more,” the little angel murmured weakly, fresh tears gleaming in her eyes, “but You already know what is in my heart. Please Father, if there is a way... make it possible.”

xxx

It was late in the night when Monica came back to the hospital where Tess, Gloria and Andrew were already working. She met her charge right at the side of Madeleine’s bed and then explained the little girl that her mother was already waiting for her in Heaven and that there was another angel that would come to take her to meet her mother. When the Irish angel told Gloria to tell the girl only the truth, she saw him coming...

The moment she had long feared. She couldn’t hide him what she had seen in the desert, otherwise she would feel she was lying to him. She met his green eyes for a short second and she knew he knew her truth. How had he found out, it didn’t matter. He knew her so well... She left Gloria sitting by the girl’s bed and she walked towards him. Andrew reached his hands to take hers and remained there for a second just watching the wonderful way they fitted so perfect. He lifted his face and met her eyes, her smiling face, but soon that smile faded and a big anguish appeared in her hazel eyes. “Andrew, I need to tell you something,” she murmured.

“I know, angel,” Andrew said sighing and touching his forehead with hers tenderly. “I know. I have to take Madeleine now. Can I meet you later?”

Monica felt a knot forming in her throat at the relieved sight in his face. Relief because she had come back to him, relief for having his best friend back... But what would he think of her later when she had to confess him that she had imagined a family life with him? He would never forgive her! A tear rolled down her cheek and she nodded weakly. “Okay. I’ll talk to you later.”

xxx

Sun was rising again in the horizon when Andrew appeared at the top of a cliff. He could see his dearest friend’s small figure at the end of it, pacing slowly from one side to another, her arms wrapped protectively around herself. His heart skipped a beat at her sight and he wanted nothing but hold her tight and never let her go again. “Monica?” he finally asked coming closer.

“Hi,” she replied weakly. “Thanks for coming.”

Carefully, Andrew took her hand and patted it lovingly. “You know I’d be wherever you ask me to.” After a long second in silence, he added. “I’m glad you’re back... I wouldn’t bear it any other way.”

It was too much. She couldn’t help but wrap her arms tightly around his neck and pull him in a tight hug. “I’m glad I’m back too,” she sobbed lightly, feeling how one of his strong hands stroked her back tenderly, while the other kept her on her feet circling her waist. When her heart finally felt a little lighter, she pulled apart and looking into his green eyes, she took a deep breath and gathering all her courage, she told him. “Andrew... I-I... There’s something I have to tell you. Something that happened to me in the desert.”

The blond angel felt suddenly as nervous as she was. He knew what was to come and he didn’t know yet how to answer to this. “I’m all ears,” was all he could say.

“I rather have you never knowing about this, Andrew,” she started and her tears rolled down freely. “But if I don’t tell you, I’d feel I’m lying to you.”

He took her hand again and kissed it lightly. “Ok. Go on, please.”

She gulped and sighed before she could continue. “I went to the desert and I was tempted by the devil. He took advantage of my weakest points showing me how it would be for me to be human... not to be only in human form and experience some of the things humans do, but completely human... That means... how it would be to have a family of my own, with children and... and a husband to love me.” Her voice had trailed off to a mere whisper and she had lowered her head as if ashamed. “God forgave me, Andrew, but He knows that’s something I had dreamed of many times. More than once I’ve wished I could really meet someone to share my life with forever, someone I could love with heart and soul and body...”

Andrew saw her tear streaked cheeks and felt the need to cup them and wipe the tears away with his tender thumbs. “Monica...” he whispered, his heart aching to see her hurting so much.

“There’s something more, Andrew...” she murmured lifting her head to meet his eyes. “I... The man I saw in the desert being my husband... it was you.” Her voice was now so low that she was barely uttering a sound. Hadn’t Andrew witnessed the scene himself, he would’ve sworn he had misheard. Monica lowered her head again and started to sob stronger. “I’m sorry,” she said, “I’m sorry, Andrew!” and then she wrapped her arms around his neck again almost desperately.

“No, Monica, no! Don’t say you’re sorry, please!” the angel of death told her holding her very tightly. He buried his face in her hair and started to cry too, practically unashamedly. “Angel, if you only realized...”

Monica was more than surprised to see Andrew holding her so tightly but she tightened her hold too. If she was losing him after this, she at least wanted to keep a good memory of his touch forever. “I love you, Andrew... please, forgive me!” she cried.

“Forgive you?” he said pulling apart and cupping her face with tender yet strong hands. “Forgive you for wishing the same I wish?”

“Andrew?” the little angel asked unable to believe she was hearing that.

“I do, Monica, I do!” he said touching her forehead and closing his eyes. “I went to look for you to the desert! I found you there!”

“Where?” she was more than surprised.

“I saw what he made you see, Monica! I was standing right behind you!” he explained frantically. “First, when I see you there in the house... I felt so terribly helpless ‘cause I couldn’t help you to get what you wanted, but when I saw who the husband was... Everything became so clear, sweetie!” he kissed her forehead. “I know now I’ve wanted the same thing more times that I can ever count... I asked the Father to make me see if there was a way...”

His eyes were so bright with a deeper love than any she had ever seen on them but they were speaking nothing but the truth. He loved her just as she loved him, and it was not something they just wished after what she had seen in the desert. No. It was something that had been inside their hearts for a long time now, and only after such a hard proof it had finally blossomed. “Father, is it true?” Monica murmured moving a hand to cup his cheek lovingly. “Are You giving us this chance?”

“Yes, Monica, yes, He is!” Andrew replied in an equal low voice. “This is not a work of devil, it is the Father’s wonders.”

“I can’t believe it, Andrew, I really can’t...”

“Then start believing, angel...” the angel of death told her cupping one of her cheeks while his other hand combed her hair. For a long second, he just looked at her carefully, as if admiring every detail of her face. Then he slowly pulled her towards him and closing his eyes, he finally sought her lips in a slow, loving kiss.

THE END